Soulmate BLOG

Cheating on a partner is a sure fire way to see a relationship come to a screaming halt, and in screaming, I mean literally screaming.  For anyone who is confused on the line of what is considered cheating and what isn’t, know this, cheating has several levels and all levels can be devastating on a relationship.

It is considered cheating on a partner when you have sex with someone other then your partner.  That one is pretty clear-cut.  And yes, oral sex is cheating, as is fondling, or any other compromising position with any one other then your partner.  To make this a little clearer, secretly meeting with someone other then your partner for a cup of coffee is cheating.  When a meeting is done in secret to the point you fear your partner finding out, regardless if there was any sexual encounter, it is cheating.  If there is a need for it to be secret other then planning a surprise party, more then likely it is being done with not honorable intentions.

Cheating on your partner is when you hang out in sex chat rooms without your partner knowing  Cheating on your partner is anything that has less then honorable intentions that you know your partner would disapprove of or you know would hurt your partner.  Basically, think of it this way, if you feel the need to hide interactions with someone of any form from your partner or know it is wrong then more then likely it is cheating.  Another way to look at it is like this, would you approve of your partner doing the same thing.  If you answer no, it is cheating.

Cheating on a partner is the quickest way to destroy the trust and respect your partner has for you.  This trust and respect is a hard thing to regain and often times never can be with out serious counseling and commitment from the offender.  It is a long hard road to rebuild trust and most offenders cannot deal with what is required from them to rebuild the relationship causing its demise.

What type of person is more apt to cheat?  First off, there are many reasons people cheat, so to give a specific type of person is next to impossible to do.  Some common traits know of people who cheat are individuals who lack integrity, have low self-esteem, and selfish “me” personalities.  However, this does not mean every person who has any of these traits will cheat.

The most common reason for a person to cheat is that their partner is not meeting their needs.  This does not mean just their sexual needs either; it can be a relationship that is lacking an emotional attachment.  A woman will cheat on their partner more commonly for lack of emotional attachment or feelings of lack of acceptance, understanding, or respect.  Another reason a woman will commonly cheat on their partner is feelings of loneliness.  Revenge is another reason both men and women cheat.  If one partner has cheated and was caught, sometimes the other partner feels the need to even the score.  Tit for tat, you might say.

Men cheat on their partner for several reasons.  One of the most common reasons is that their sexual needs are not being fulfilled.  One way to try to prevent this is of course to maintain an active sex life but also not allow it to become redundant.  Find ways to keep the spark alive.  This can go for both partners.  Your sex life should be something you should be able to openly talk about with each other and check in with each other from time to time to make sure each persons needs are being met.

Other reasons men may cheat on their partner are that it is a challenge.  It is exciting to them to see if they can get away with it.  Others do because they can get away with it without being caught.  Some do because the opportunity presents itself and they jump on it for pure selfish sexual wants.  On the opposite side of this spectrum, a man may have cheated on his partner before and caught but the woman quickly forgave him and there were no real consequences for his actions.  This basically gives a man the green flag to do it again with the mind set that there will be no real severe penalty so why not.

Mid life crisis is another common reason men cheat.  They begin to question their manhood and attractiveness and another woman shows interest it boost their ego.  This however is becoming another more common reason in the recent years for a woman to cheat as well.

Another common reason men cheat is that their partner nags at them too much.  The nagging turns off their desire to have any form of intimacy with them and they go and have a relationship where they do not have to hear the constant nagging.  Your relationship is in serious danger though if your partner cheats on you for the reasons that either they are no longer sexually turned on by you or they no longer love you.  Some men, before they jump ship want to make sure they have a soft landing elsewhere prior to ending a relationship.  In these situations, generally, the relationship has been over in the home foe quite sometimes and red flags were probably there just not picked up on.

There are no just reasons for cheating on a partner, but the sad fact is that it is an all too often occurrence in relationships.  Keeping an open communication can help lower the risks of a partner cheating on you as well as keeping the love alive in all aspects of your relationship.  This takes both partners willingness to make it work.