Soulmate BLOG

Some companies discourage or prohibit fraternizing or dating of fellow employees, however it is something that is commonly done.  Sometimes such relationships can lead to a successful marriage, however other times, disaster.  If you are considering dating a fellow employee, take into consideration the risks that could occur.

When weighing out the decision to date a fellow employee take into consideration if the relationship went sour how you would feel continuing to work and see this person on a daily basis.  If the relationship ends extremely bad, can you keep your emotions in check and not bring the drama to work or would you be tempted to slash a tire?  If you cannot maintain a norm of self-control, it could cost you your job.  Is the possible relationship worth the risk?

If you can honestly answer yes, that the relationship is worth the risks then there are still a few dating fellow etiquette rules you should know.

• Check company policy regarding dating fellow employees.  If it discourages against it, I would suggest avoiding it the same.
• Do not continue to ask out a fellow employee if they have already told you know.  This could border on harassment and cost you your job.  Accept the no and leave it at that. How well do you know this fellow employee?  Don’t risk your job over a short sordid romance.  Get to know the person you are interested in well before even taking it to the dating question.  You may find out although they may be the hottest thing walking at the office you have absolutely nothing in common.  This will save an unnecessary break up and uncomfortable feelings in the work environment.  After learning more about the fellow employee and you are still interested, keep the dates light and friendly until you know if it has any potential of going into something deeper.
• Keep the intimacy out of the work place.  Leave the flirting for out on the town or the privacy of your home.  For one you can be setting yourself up for unnecessary gossip as well as your employer may not take to kindly of your lack of attention to work detail when your carrying on. Keep your work and personal relationship separate.  Work issues stay at work and personal issues stay out of the work environment.  If you cannot wear dual hats then a relationship with a fellow employee is not a good option for you.
• Lastly, make sure the fellow employee is single.  You are asking for double the trouble if you consider dating a fellow employee who is married.

There are pros and some serious cons to dating a fellow employee.  The pros are you know they have a job and possible even what type of income they make.  You know their work habits as well as sense of dedication by how much time they miss from work.  You have a common denominator right off the bat, your profession  You understand each others work hours and need for them which helps eliminate excessive bickering if one or the other has to stay late at work.  These all can be great; however, the cons can cost you your job.

If the relationship ends un-mutually, it could lead to confrontations in the work place that can cost you your job.  If you have a fight outside of work and it is brought into the work environment can cost you your job.  The sexual harassment line can be fuzzy when employees start to date; a common reasons company will disallow employee/employee or employee/boss relationships.  Revenge is a powerful ugly beast and if a relationship ends ugly, accusations could be made.  This will cost you your job.  You can also risk the loss of other work related friendships due to dating a fellow employee.

Know and weigh your risks of dating fellow employees and if you still think it is worth the risks make sure you have a back up plan in case things go array.  Have enough money in savings in case you lose your job to give you a cushion until you find new employment.  The dating world can be tough enough as it is, but when you mix work and dating you may very well have some really hard work ahead of you.

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